Live from my living room

I was thrown in to a mix of nostalgia this week. I have been on vacation with my parents and it brought me back to school days where they would take vacations and we didn't have to worry about planning anything out. We went where the wind swept us and ended up in some back woods town of Florida or on the beach with salt on our lips and sandy toes.

Growing up isn't hard, it's frustrating. Vacations have to be planned out, babies are thrown in the mix and it seems impossible to just take a relaxing beach trip. Then there is that whole "While you are making plans, life has a curve ball up its sleeve" thing. Our grand plan was to go to Disney but while some of us don't quite have grown up jobs yet, it means that time off costs us money and every spare penny is essential in our household. I started off my vacation with no water in my house due to a busted well and I am ending it getting sun kissed in my back yard with lemon juice in my hair as if I am in high school again.

Five years is a short time to be away from the drama that is high school, yet so much changed in that brief blip of time. It seems like just yesterday I was sitting in the 'Dog Bowl' for lunch munching away on vending machine pop-tarts rehearsing drama lines with friends. Now I am sitting in my living room in my childhood home which I own with my husband. I can hear my daughter sleeping in my old bedroom.

I have scrolled through my newsfeed in awe this week. So many of my high school friends are now becoming wives and husbands. Some of them even mothers or fathers while others have gone soul searching around the world or States. High school always asked us about our Ten year plan. You know, where do you see yourself in ten years? Well, I can honestly say, not friggin here! Are you kidding me? I couldn't think past the next time I was going to lay out and listen to Justin Timberlake or Nelly Furtado on the radio with lemon juice in my hair and baby oil on my skin. I was thinking about senior skip day and how much trouble I was going to be in for coming home with sunburn. I was not thinking about a ten year plan and graduating from college or becoming hitched.

To all of my married friends reading this; Guys, we are freaking married!
And while many of us rushed in to marriage shortly after high school *raises hand* it's been an amazing roller coaster. I wasn't ready for the whole college thing. I wanted to live life and see stuff. I wanted to get a job and live on my own (or with a roommate who happened to become my husband).

Life taught me lessons these past five years and the one big lesson I am still learning is marriage. Almost three years in to the game and I am learning how to live with my best friend every day. I am still learning all of his quirks andI have found which ones irritate me. I am learning how to be patient with someone when all I really want to do is yell and call him a stupid head (because I am five).

I have no idea what our pastor said right before we said 'I do.' I know it was somewhere along the lines of 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 and in sickness and in health. I was too focused on keeping my knees slightly bent and not putting the ring on the wrong finger. What I do know is, I made a vow and a promise to my husband to be by his side whatever situation might arise. Be it good, bad, ugly, sad, happy. We all made a promise to our spouse. It does not matter if you made the vow later than others, it all means the same. You guys have to stick together like peanut butter and jelly.

I'm sure you have all read the infamous do's and don'ts in marriage and I have to say, they are right. Please don't use that ugly 'D' word unless counseling has been exhausted. Never stop dating your spouse (plan dates for at least once every month) Just because they are your ball and chain does not mean you can't have a girls night or sleepover with your bestie. Likewise for males but reversed. Spend time apart as much as possible. You are spending the rest of your lives together and living together, you will since him/her at some point...promise. Always say goodnight; sometimes it isn't possible to lock yourselves in the same room and hash out the fight. This is especially true if your spouse is a person who needs space to rethink the situation before harsh words are said. So, always say goodnight and 'I love you.'  Think of marriage as being with your BFF. We all have fights with our BFF but we never really hate them. We just need time apart and then once we are back together, it is like time never even passed.

The same is definitely true for marriage. You picked your best friend as your spouse. It is going to take some time for them to get to BFF status because obviously you grew up with your BFF and this person still has to get to know your weird quirks just like you have to learn theirs. Yes, your BFF knows your quirks but this one person can know too. They can also know your thoughts throughout the day and what you think would be good for dinner. You will learn they like to leave their smelly socks on the couch and they will learn that your pants will come off as soon as you get home and you will scratch your butt. They will also learn to love you for that very reason just as you will still love them for stinking up your furniture.

The point is, life is changing as we know it and in five years we are going to be at our ten year reunion bragging about our spouses and kids. Let's be the class to brag about accomplishments, not divorces.
Life always has a curve ball up its sleeve but I am doing like Elsa and letting go.

Ps-Congrats to all you newlyweds!

Love, Nystroms and Nugget.